Drawing the Purdue Calumet Campus on a Friend's Left Butt Cheek

Chop up the jellied blood and act proper when the shoe salesman arrives. When he gets slightly tipsy from the hot vodka that comes out the tin spigot? Fuck like a duck in a truck. Remodel your terminal nodes in the rosy mist of idiocy. Finally, embowel the liver in liquified philanthropist's teeth.

There are Frozen Beef Knuckles in East Chicago

After a modest, gifted villain retired, dogs transported his body through shadows. But what he does not know is that their powers include a knack for illegally surrounding minds and kidnapping morality.

We imagine a centaur (but he's half-crawfish instead of horse) eating at Bronko's

Blessed be the fun-loving individual who loves a well-bred stallion.

His closest friends would describe him as an elderly lady who owns a horse ranch.

Cursed be the life of the party, wholesome but not preachy, he makes friends and learns to resist surviving.

What were the events that led him to conspire to be rid of profanity and school assignments?

You won’t know you’ve been seduced until a buffalo stampede develops.

Sassy Musician Swims in Cedar Lake

Buddy had limited edition sexuality, as well as the dilemma of uncertainties. A sensitive young film maker, he shuffled off to steal ten paintings by a hooker, Jack Slade. After being clobbered, Buddy went in search of a man who would revolt as a protest against Broadway. His goal in life was to be a seductive young Texas rodeo queen, disillusioned, dancing, painting a 35 foot catamaran.

We are the Wicked Errors of Michigan City

I’m bored. I want a magical potion.

You want some vintage aged wine. Your grandfather, a secret ghoul, discovers that his flatulence (tooting) gives him unusual powers. He is the product of a dysfunctional family, encouraged by his wife, Dorothy, to be a doctor.

To kill time I partake in the puerile use of text-speak.

Watching a Lady Paint a Mannequin in the Art Theater

When you crawl on the ground, in the fashion of a plastic soldier toy with a flimsy rifle, I worry about your penis.

Will it be abraded by the gravel? Scarred and burned by the dingy berber we bought when we were desperate? Will it attract bloodsuckers?

I see it clearly, a movie I've watched repeatedly to the point to decay, a fraying magnetic strip in a brittle carapace, sunburnt label nearly unreadable. Your flayed phallus, and you're the only one to blame.

Forklift Inside Bon Femme Café

A family of burdened elves convince strange beings to accept their similarities. The craftsmen like to take control of octopus statuettes, using a crystal. This will not be an easy task, as resistance from opposing witches will unite all cave people, jungle men, and pirates. Being a woman, the new martial arts trainer likes to drink alcohol, loot, and plunder. Have the witches bitten off more than they can chew?

Cackling Daddy in Porter County

She is inspired by Jerry and Otis. Through the lens of these two Italian-American teens, a complex girl experiences intense flashbacks. She harbors a glamorous narrative, taxing a New England family in a profound way.

However, the stronger she becomes, the more she draws the attention of warlocks who want distraction and joy. They have become exhausted from dealing in antique bicycles, but still enjoy a ride on a Schwinn Stingray from the 1960's.

Hunting for Crazy Mushrooms under the Skyway

We know there are extremists who take tests in a quiet room.

They obey only the pugs and need government help.

Just imagine a weaponized Asperger's Syndrome.

Welcome to the Sublimation Fields of Hobart

Belinda is very rich and a stale woman who has been involved with people working for an international terrorist. She feels like the rich girl on the deathbed.

Belinda soon learns that she has pearls and $1,000,000. Because of the violence in this world, the cave dwellers use their powers to make her stronger.

Belinda and the cave dwellers meet up with witches, vampires and many strange poor and homeless people. As they slowly learn to control a monstrous teenager tormented by one cursed beast, they endlessly pursue sick and twisted objectives.

Chin-colored Moped at Star Plaza Theater

Brush fires in a world ruled by discarded rebels slowly forced a clone to paint his mother, who is a mirror of suffering without a moral code. In doing so, he mysteriously influenced Shakespeare to add the philosophical element in his works.

Southlake Mall Orgy Cancelled

Things go terribly wrong when an alien clones his aging, almost dead professors. When one of his professors tells him he should capture the tyrannical king, he inadvertently catches a young man exiting a spacecraft cloaked inside the tail of the Hale-Bopp comet. Upon packing whatever belongings he has, including his jewels, the alien brings scary dinosaurs into a wasteland. He ends up destroying a log cabin.

Deep Spiritual Experience in Strack and Van Til's

Michigan has relaxing tabloids and newspapers. Wisconsin has terror, the biggest terror.

A lifetime of living in enormous suspense ultimately enabled anglers to murder a killer conservation officer. What began as a frenzied career outdoors became a massive scandal.

Eyeing the Free Sherbet at Miner-Dunn

The gas-mask wearing robot spent a year and a half studying grapefruit. She’s a quite unpleasant misfit, ticked off at animals that no one else has. Her ex-boyfriend preferred flying around. She stuck needles in him.

Mister Chardonnay, Hammond Stud

Fascists from the future do battle with U.S. Senators! A group of underworld gangsters found objects in Washington, D.C. and do craft projects for hours using gourds.

Their funny day to day conversations with the vampire inspire animals to say no to Saddam Hussein when he rhymes and makes perfect poetry.

Seeking Entomological Ecstasy at Lighthouse Place Premium Outlets

When two bodies are unearthed by an attractive and ambitious Turkish businessman, a number of middle-aged men begin smuggling complicated text books on murder. They had been taken to a party. Not a single one vanished. But all was not as it should be, for the old medieval adults vowed to take revenge on a vicious gangland criminal.

Burns Harbor Parade of Pervs

When observing a ghost, a free-thinking, artistic radio personality feels grief. Faced with feelings of bitter love, she exposes the difficult husband who's responsible for the recent death of a good-looking and clever recluse. Yet, she’s intrigued by ange! The intimidating snoops in a small town are intricately honoring the dead, unable to hide.

From Fraser Lane to a Nuclear Submarine: Hungarian Tony's Tale

The events in the bedroom raise your awareness about sex. Currently, it’s everywhere. If the priests just below the porch call it paradise, are they complacent? Is your drinking water actually fudge? You deserve chocolates! Too many Americans become what the girls like. Too many Americans handle church scandals properly. The next time that you go to the playground, little politicians will stay in the empty lot next door.

The Swill they Serve at Casa Gallardo

Hometown business folks imagine that toxic waste dumps hide drug traffic. Unidentified grandchildren, out of control, consume automotive water.

Property managers with very fond memories of bad management techniques usually listen to the cat. They smile.

Melted into the Intrigues of Lake Station

Come sit on the werewolf. He enjoys a fright. But now the ghouls have come and he seems to be rampaging.

Mike steps into the middle of the frenzy and is miraculously revived by aliens. But his girlfriend, Vanessa, has a PI license. From her home in Gloucester, she has been able to successfully combine luncheons with arousing situations.

With the aid of a Cocker Spaniel, they investigate small time farming of marijuana in high school parking lot.

Ornery Unusual Sales Associate at Office Depot

Christians plunged into rational dreams freely, exacerbated by alleged children. After two years pursuing haunted wisdom, they recapture a peaceful intelligence. A Christian agent near the Holy Land was serving alcoholic barbarians the viscera of Communist folks. True alcohol, uncaring, incorporates electric oblivion.

We Learn to Dance Crazy in Lowell

Marriage is a secret thrust: a reality minus divine temptation, an ultimate construction of arrogant weakness. When compromise is cursed by honesty and sensuality at its finest, their love expands while a faceless whisper can't be forgiven.

Not quite normal enough to stand the test of tortured cosmetic thirst, love without unknown screams must ultimately drift.

Would becoming head accountant of demons and their freak minions cause her to dance? Would delving into the iridescent playfield of the vampire bring moonshadows upon him?

You Imagine a Crispy Tongue in Your Schoop's Milkshake

A small time drug dealer, creator of a weapon of conquest, grows depraved. A big time drug dealer from New Orleans, who conducted seven role-playing fantasy campaigns, is torn from his tainted world. He has a carousel in an abyss.

Through a series of events set in motion by the small time drug dealer, edible children wreak havoc on a sinister being that was once mixed up with the Ancient Celestial Goddess.

Sneaking a Sandwich from Schlotzky's into the Lake County Public Library

Stumbling, weightless commercialism continues a hazy improvisation. After a long whimsical eclecticism, a ghostly violin embellishment introduces the beast; throughout the 70s, demonic apeshit like a choir of children fleshed out the madness.

The Year We Spilled our Love into Highland

A dashing, charming, old man, was not killed by a young professional photographer. Now he lives in Pennsylvania where he tries to kill different people.

His handsome and apparently nymphomaniac stepmother tries to kill him. She gripes about the peaceful resort town of Palm Beach.

When someone tries to kill an auto mechanic, things begin to happen. Two of his three cookbooks have sold well.

I Smoked a Cigarette in Portage, Once

After leaving her husband, a tiger striped cat began telling female tabby cats humorous stories. They wandered in the bushes, scared of cat bones in the soil.

Friendly humans in a loving, often chaotic, but always symbiotic relationship protect a house with devastating strength. Human clothing in a wood chipper seems to indicated dreadful deeds.

Fucked Hard from Behind at Fetla's

Why did Jesus overthrow our capitalist government? It is dirty. As an active Christian, I orchestrated the inner circle of the Illuminati. Satanic corporations have been personally reared by Congressional Republicans. The beautiful 1st Biblical Antichrist, a rich superhuman, has to enjoy the wondrous awakening of the principality of Federal corruption. I was blessed to spoon evil. With the Living God, I do crime.

To Stretch One's Goofy Tubes in Hebron

Sombre townspeople need a sanctuary at sea. They have to put dolphins into an enchanted bay. There lives a beautiful English teacher who dreams that a magical giant attacked some executives. Some gigantic people seem real; one microscopic young lady will exhume criminals by using martial arts.

Total Cuck Spotted at Round the Clock in Valpo

No race driver is also an authority on the history of the Academy Awards. However, by sure determination, a thoroughly spectacular rookie driver captured the historian. On three occasions, one of the worst drivers ever teamed with Ronald Reagan to hold the self-proclaimed Clown Prince of journalism spellbound.

Idiot's Flex in Schererville

Lies and half-truths unnerve a small criminal as he navigates the complexities of the city’s tragedies. He now enjoys old mustard and water birds.

He is surrounded by steam boat captains. They are the only ones who can stop this ruthless man.

Glen Park Bakery is Vacant

There is a danger of not being able to capture animal friends; the simplicity of a rhyming grandmother will be a light unto many pathways. God’s word is meant to encourage repetitive patterns, and we don’t have the men to teach us what ashamed children avoid. Will it cause you to stir up your perverted calling?

Dunes Highway Heat Mirage

Two men, one white and one black, play with street vagrants in Chicago. They are the world’s greatest mortals. Drafted by a deranged king to destroy computer games, they conquer a dwarven city. In order to find the artifacts, they spend time with dark assassins at a window factory. That’s fine. The dark wanderers always put a smile on the face of a monkey with their sick and twisted humour.

Busy as an Andrean High School Guidance Counselor

Thanks to his positive outlook on life, an organist will discover that Antarctica is NOT the only place to find penguins. Enjoy the suspense! Conquistadors can now look back and say that the pleasure of running into killers has been overlooked by historians over the centuries. You may think you know the outcome of the story, but an enigmatic, stunning, blue-eyed colonel went from wanting to be an actress, to a chef, to finally end at wanting to create vampires.

Derek at Hegewisch Records Screams in a Volvo

The tree seems to work. The town’s people received fruit. One day, critters filled with eggs exuded a calming tainted blood; a sleeping friend mixed the sacred blood with dragon screams. Will the magical creatures help giant bats trick goblins into finally listening to music?

Balloon Crisis in Downtown Crown Point

They cannot help themselves as they slowly explore a distressing love affair with the man! Their lives continue to change as they find themselves caught in so many strange wildlife attacks.

Eight years have passed and no more attacks upon humans have taken place. Everyone involved, engulfed in toxic and radioactive waste, engages in the deepest and darkest sexual indiscretions known to man. The food that they've consumed during the past eight years was once escaped prisoners! A huge sink hole forms in the Ocala National Forest which always seems to dominate each one of their lives.

Faster Hand Jobs Behind Albanese Candy Factory

A seductively vibrant freelance writer falls squarely into something more sinister and supernatural than otherworldly sexual eccentricities. When a sad, young king is betrothed to the evil sorcerer, the horrid prince of the Jeweled Isles feels happiness.

It is the world of love, a sudden picnic, a private, fantasy world where forty-one friends talk without grieving.

Miller Beach Serenade

Princess Sara was living the horrors. A sick girl, she yearns anxiously to be squashing chickens on the front page of every newspaper, magazine and tabloid in London. Five years ago, the attractive heir to the English throne attempted to steal an ambulance. Drilling for oil, her actions set in motion a tragic course of events that entertain Jack Thompson, a Paramedic in Portland, Oregon.

Shittin Secretly in Griffith

Robert worked. Rae wanted a completely different life. James had expected to see a ranch. Rae did not mess up after her divorce. Robert did not need a little rock and roll. James has enjoyed success as a real estate broker, songwriter, poet and older brother. Rae did not dream of doing evil.

But something happens. Someone evil wants to do things like meet a girl and fall in love. His assignment: to photograph his wife’s closest friends. At the lowest point of despair, he discovers a coarse town full of rough 'n' tumble cowboys, hard-working common folk. Raised by the tall, dark-haired person, he never knew a girl and her pony.

Dyer's Friendly Ladies

In her Demerol-induced sleep, Jenny loves the witch. She has no choice. Her hobbies are standing with ease and sculpting Satan.

Jenny is so handsome. When her memory returns, she morphs into Robert, a legendary Knight of King Henry VIII’s court.

He is so handsome. He has just rescued a witch from tiny angels. Robert is transported back in time to 1999 and is contracted to kill former Marines in eight states.

To Be Swallowed in Chesterton

Good times, parties, non-ending cash flows, deceit, and of course sexual bliss. You've met her before: a professor of supernatural studies hoping for fantasies and temptations to bind up aching wounds she was dealt from her conniving over-sexed Grandmother.

Shortly after returning home from a visit with a Diva with an attitude, she attempts to capture the shadows and voices of her villainous and recognizable power. Erotica runs free and sexual pleasure is endured!

The Cold of Kemil Beach

Teased at school and ignored at home, a boy grows into an unpopular sixteen-year-old in the eastern forest. That is, until he discovers he can visualize the Internet.

Using the alias Rocky Tetons, he becomes one of the most feared imaginary people in the digital playground. Although he falls for the grandeur of his video game world, he cannot forget the tightly controlled North Korean nuclear program. After the man finally is kidnapped from his Wyoming cabin, he must use his world-class gaming skills to hop into his beat-up truck.

But when a beautiful angel with elite skills and reflexes suddenly emerges, he stares into the Grand Canyon. He becomes a botanist and forester. He is kidnapped from a Chicago hotel and he learns valuable lesson about the restless desert.

It is a dilemma that often drives him crazy.

Virtual Tour of Tiebel's Restaurant

Christopher is 13 and he doesn’t stay out of places where many enchanting Christophers become magical, realizing the he becomes invisible.

Grace is an actor. The joy ends when she hates school and shrinks to the size of green haunted objects. She is a temptress and is catapulted out of a house.

Grace’s granny learns how to move objects with other people’s thoughts. Christopher fills Grace’s head with strange, quiet friends.

Auditioning to Join the Fuzz Factor Rock Band

While Amber and her younger brother Stevie are playing in Alaska, they find an ancient mummified photographer. They learn quite by accident that the forces that would silence them can make items disappear. While trying to make an old newspaper reporter disappear as well, statues come to life and let Amber and Stevie get a pinball machine. When a snooping neighbor boy gets hold of the gruesome hand, he panics and imprisons both Amber and Stevie behind a false wall.

Fight between Grown-Ups at Crossroads Cinema

Most space shows on TV have one thing in common: the President of Ghana. Scientists know Earth cannot put his life in danger. Relocating to another forest, a beautiful lady will try to discover a way to investigate the mystery of the knowledge man. This is everything we’ve learned.

Unless something phenomenal happens, the enemy in this forest will become red, albeit without human form. With the eventual destruction of this enemy, the failure of disembodied intellects will be for naught.

A Flat Chasm in Munster

Time is running out for the only person that can save the one fixated with making your life wounded and helplessly loved. What would you do if your mindless slave turned out to be the only person not afraid to use his evil to control his childhood friend Chris? After the rapture, the ever-maniacal travelers elude lunacy. Their cowering subjects, four innocent men, destroy eternity for everyone.

Waitresses of Angelo's Sicilian Cart

In a land where the vile sleeping computer-animated pets did scary stuff, the technology could very well be catastrophic. Kevin is a young adult who specializes in anxiety. He was, until recently, in total control of a dark and gloomy place called Wolverhampton.

Forgetting the Enchanted Forest

Saints rap about Alexander Bull, son of the famous Norwegian violinist, Ole Bull. A remarkable woman offends a group of high school students. We hope giants attack people. Time and space become vagaries of paranormal psychology.

Semen in the Gravel at Fred Rose Park

The noises painted the imagined potential of sanctuary. The transformation of the vivid mind into an unreachable piece of broken poetry begins to terrorize a small city. Often children are afraid of grandchildren.

The Mustard Pot from Bakers Square

It is done. At the end, a disaster created great value: a child learned unique activities. The stories following the disaster stimulate the teachers of the hidden dragon. The gods are poets, building their warrior animals to ensure the hideous imagination of the forest.

Lightning Assault Ogden Dunes Style

Have you ever been changed immensely by the physical connection between persons? Have you experienced a method of sending individuals into a torrid camaraderie? Family ties and historical curiosity provide each of us with an emotionally fulfilling culmination to a dying relationship.

Can a story from the grave pleasantly titillate one’s emotionally entwined erotic sensitivities? Sometimes the fairy tale makes you giddy with anticipation, tickling some dark place in your memory.

Nobody will worry about a disillusioned daddy, bogged down tragically in a sultry and controversial story. Make him your friend. Trust him, and he will pave a tortuous, exciting path to desire and fear. He enjoys golf, fear, amnesia, and travel with his boy toy. He has been a trial lawyer and a loyal Purdue Boilermaker. If he makes you tremble all over, it’s okay to quiver and bounce like a pony running down a new trail in somebody else's mind.

Braiding Long Guy Hair at Vanis Salon

What starts out as a teacher poisoning an amateur sleuth becomes a weekly dinner party. We learn, eventually, to savor the beautiful Baptist minister's mail-order murder.

Carp at the Lake George Dam

The quiet deadly surgeon, detached and desperately dramatic, vacationed in Sarasota, Florida with his ancient friends. He’s sort of lovable. The quirky daddy enjoys lying, but at least he’s not as smart as a member of an outlaw gang.

The Salt on a Mall Pretzel

The police have never been described as redundant. The Sheriff simultaneously shot a little boy and bared his great set of legs. Things have been poisoning the Mayor and he cannot murder a firefighter with a shotgun. His wife assures him he still remains happy about this.

Patty Melt at the Paragon Family Restaurant

After the death of a well-hidden husband, the praise team accidentally comes. Can the older sister be proud? Her only concern is deceiving her headstrong sugardaddy.

The Swollen Face of Valparaiso

Everyone is a bodiless fire; the craziness of this is well-known. During your journey you take your lost love to the city’s visionary artist, who experienced and observed death. He was certified with the state.

Art Gallery in a Gary Strip Mall

After a fun-loving alligator and some wonderful fire eaters speak to kids about healthcare, they become dazzling! But the fun really begins when a snake breaks out of the stomach of a boy named Zachary Peters.

The Sirens of Calumet Park

An elderly predator from Italy has to recover from experiences working with children. He is a master in the art of leadership prevention.

Things really snowball when the queen’s dog, who just happens to be the president’s daughter, takes a field trip to the fire station. She believes that the terror grows impatient. The dirt and the tears restore their magic.

Ripply Beef Edges

Maggie's dream of a shooting at the safe place is guaranteed to destroy joy. Her artistic and medically related background allows her to challenge a troubled young man who vacations at an ocean-side hotel.

On the verge of an emotional breakdown, she believes that her new guardian is a handsome replica. He was the source of all sexual animosities.

In a tri-state area where women outnumber men, she experiences many exciting adventures along with her palomino filly. This leads to a misunderstanding. After the funeral, society's so-called misfits conquer the cathedral.

Spilling our Mister Misty Drinks

I was so enthralled by their intelligent bear and homosexual cat that I decided to start boating.

During the course of some twelve or so years, I would only watch horror movies, so I constructed small boats.

Later that year, a close family member became general manager of the busy port. I finished boating.

They are not alone in the boat.

I accept most of the blame.

Threesome in Merrillville

My young life was strongly influenced by my sterile grandparents' television. Having a flair for art, I became one of the most violent children on the island. I have no family in the country so I became a paratrooper. It is a rewarding job. I'm a man but I feel like the woman's voice comes from inside me. What the hell is that.